Haley Carlson, Spring Editor

The path is twisted 

It winds through the trees

But through the mist the hike does not seem to go on forever

Away from the noise, away from the world

Away from the cruel words

The thin mist grows thicker with every step

Thoughts flood my brain

Eating away at my confidence like termites to wood


I think about the feelings I felt when I saw you

And the pain I felt when I realized you would never feel the same

With every step I feel a little more fear

Soon it is sworming inside of me waiting for a way to come out

But I know going back down the mountain would do me no good 


It was too late

Too much pain, too much fear, too much embarrassment

Too much numbness

I have been feeling emotions but they were finally getting the best of me

Now all I am is numb

If you looked me in the eyes as I was climbing that mountain maybe I wouldn’t feel the way I do

Maybe if I called out this would end differently

But my voice is gone from screaming for so long


Yet no one ever heard me

So as I climb this mountain one last time

No one ever stopped to ask me what was really wrong

Because a smile and a quick, “I’m fine” is all they needed to hear

Maybe if someone saw me walking up this mountain they could come to my rescue

Because people always say that life is worth living

But what is life with no family, no friends, no hope


All  want to keep going stops

Now as I reach the peak I look down

As I look into the deep mist all I see is an illusion

It’s no longer the person I am inside

More of a fabricated version that I despise when I look in the mirror

I look over the edge and all I see is sky

And suddenly I’m falling